I Have Cracked the Code

I was scrolling through the Utah's Most Wanted list to see if I knew anyone,  with the dream of busting some obnoxious coworker or neighbor and receiving the key to the city.

I didn't see anyone I know, but I did take note of something else.  Most of these people had extraordinarily large foreheads.  I have come to the conclusion that crime is not the result of a massive string of bad choices, but simply by the shape of your head.

Looking closer and I began to notice a startling pattern.  Let me show you.

They each have distinct large bulging foreheads, and a point at the top of their head.  Their eyebrows all seem to be the same shape. They are also all sex offenders.



This next group of people all have small eyes, that are set really close together.

They were also all arrested for drug related crimes, so they have that in common as well.  Of course, look at them, are you really surprised they're druggies?


These next people were all arrested for various charges of theft and felony.  They all have oval shaped heads.  I'm not saying fatties are thieves, so don't mistake oval for chubby.  They also have similar lips, besides the fact they're all in frowns, of course.
 

 
 
Hey, why the long face? Oh, 'cause you were arrested for forgery or fraud? Yeah, so were these next people, and they all have a long face.

Ok, I'm not really saying you have unnaturally close eyes so you much be selling crack, or that your massive forehead suggests rapist tendencies.  Another big thing all these people have in common is that they are beyond stupid.

I'm curious, what do you think this guy did?

And last but not least, here is my personal favorite.

If you wanna see the list for yourself, click here.