Errands

Do you ever hear mothers say (or have said yourself) that it would be easier to run errands without the kids?  Well, sometimes I feel that way about Jordan.  He's a gem for certain, and I adore his company, but sometimes I feel like his mother when we're at the store and he's asking if he can get some Twinkies, and when I say no he sneaks them into the cart anyway.

About a month or so ago we were in the drive through at the bank and there were two cars to the left of us blocking our view of whoever was at the window helping us.  Jordan whispers that he wants a sucker, and asked me to ask the lady for a sucker.  I said no, I'm not going to ask the lady for a sucker for my husband.  He replied with the suggestion of asking for it or our kid.  I said no.  He then leans over me and yells into the microphone "I want a sucker, MOM!"  Which was easily a perfect impression of a bratty teenager.

Wholeheartedly embarrassed I conducted my banking business expediently and hightailed it out of there sans sucker.

For the rest of the evening I got to hear Jordan lamenting about his sucker.  "Gosh, I wish I had a sucker."  "You should have just asked for that sucker."  (Sigh) "I could go for a sucker right about now." 

A couple days ago we found ourselves back in the bank drive through, and yet again Jordan leaned over and asked for a sucker.  Instinctively I said no, but he persisted and I recalled the last time and determined it wasn't worth another evening of Jordan's regret.  So I asked the lady if I could have a sucker for my kid.  She said yeah, and Jordan immediately covered his mouth and giggled like a little girl, only this time we didn't have the advantage of cars blocking us from view.  I'd bet the teller knew exactly who the sucker was for.

We then went to Smiths to return a Redbox.  While there Jordan decided he needed more Mt. Dew.  I can say with the utmost confidence that the last thing that Child of God needs is more Mt. Dew.  We got to the beverages section and saw that the 2 liters were on sale for 84 cents a piece, with buy 4 get 2 free.  Sure, that's a steal of a deal, but my heart sunk when I realized that we would be going home with 6 2-liters of Mt. Dew.  Right now there are 3, (yes, 3) new flavors of Mt. Dew, and Jordan decided he needed all of them, including the classics.  The only problem was the new flavors didn't come in the 2 liters, they only came in the 24 packs.  Thus began the debate on how many he could get.  I told him he could get 2 (believe me, that was my compromise) and he began weighing the pros and cons of each flavor, thinking it through to ensure he made the right decision.

So here we have a cart with six 2-liter sodas, and two 24 packs.  I joked that we were going to have to tell the cashier that we were having a party so they didn't think we were nuts.  He took to this idea wholeheartedly and proclaimed that now we needed chips to go along with the party story.  I said we didn't need chips, but he saw Munchies in ranch flavor.  I still said we didn't needs chips, but he said "Oh, but they're ranch flavor, you must not have seen that" aaaaand they were in the cart.  As we walked to checkout he made sure he mentioned the awesome party we were going to have loudly so people passing by could be assured this fabled party was going down.

Maybe next time I'll just leave my child-husband at home.